Swearing on a Stone

I’ve always had a soft spot for stones. Not the sparkly, jewellery-shop kind—just your average, scuffed-up little pebble you find on a path. As a kid, I’d walk along kicking one gently ahead of me, pretending I was relocating it to a better home. Somewhere with a view, maybe a little mossy garden. Somewhere it wouldn’t be trampled, or worse—run over by a passing tractor. I genuinely felt for those stones. I believed in them.

Turns out, I was just getting in some early career prep. Because now, as a wedding celebrant, I get to give these humble little rocks the moment in the spotlight they truly deserve. Step aside, confetti and cupcakes—here comes the oathing stone.

Historically, oathing stones were used as tangible witnesses to promises, vows, and solemn oaths. Before we had fancy notarised contracts or Instagram to prove we meant what we said, people relied on these stones to seal their word at a time when trust was everything and words were binding. When two clans made a pact or a truce, representatives might swear on an oathing stone to honour their promise. These stones were kept safe, sometimes passed down generations, as physical reminders of solemn agreements. The idea was simple: find a stone, place your hand on it, and swear your vow. To break it would be to invite bad luck—or worse, a bit of ancient Highland curse mojo.

That old pact of clan rivalries has softened into a promise of lifelong love, fidelity, and support — arguably a much nicer use of the tradition! At the ceremony, the couple often holds the oathing stone together—sometimes placing their hands on it as they exchange their vows. This act transforms that humble pebble into a powerful symbol of commitment.

I love a good oathing stone ritual. Somehow it seems to add weight to a couple's promises. And I love how this beautiful, tactile moment connects the ceremony with our rich cultural heritage. Plus, it’s pretty fun to hold a stone and pretend you’re swearing a legendary oath — “By this stone, I vow to love you even when you hog the duvet!”

But what happens to the stone once the ceremony's over? Well, some couples like to leave it on the beach or riverbank where they found it, or toss it back into the water, releasing their old selves or past uncertainties and sending their vows out into the vast, ever-changing world. It’s a love letter to the universe, like sending a message in a bottle—though with slightly more gravitas and not so much chance of it washing up in Cornwall.

Of course, you don't have to chuck your stone away if you don't want to. Some couples like to hold onto their stone as a meaningful keepsake. Some even buy a stone on Etsy with their initials carved into it, which is taking things a bit far if you ask me, but hey—each to their own, right? They might put it in their garden, symbolically “grounding” the marriage. It’s like having a little piece of Scottish folklore watching over your begonias. Others pass it down through generations as a family treasure, connecting future couples to their ancestors’ solemn vows.

There’s something wonderfully down-to-earth about an oathing stone. It’s not flashy or expensive (unless you buy it on Etsy, in which case don't say I didn't warn you); it doesn’t need to sparkle under the lights. Instead, it’s solid, simple, and timeless—a perfect metaphor for marriage itself. In a world full of Instagram-perfect moments and high-tech wedding gadgets, the oathing stone reminds us that some of the most powerful symbols are the simplest. It connects couples to their heritage, their promises, and each other — all with the weight of a smooth, unassuming pebble.